table for one please!

this is the first time i have been single since i have been a christian. and i just have to say it is amazing. i have never been able to be me and have a true relationship with Jesus until recently. nor have i ever understood why people would talk about being single as a blessing, but now i do. i feel like in a relationship you have to be strong. strong in your faith and with Jesus, so not to stumble. you have to have boundaries, which to be honest is hard. if you are not strong with these things you do stumble, and i stumbled, i also caused other people to stumble. for this i am sorry. and through all of it i was hurt. but i am stronger because of it, i have a better relationship with my dad, i have a stronger faith and relationship with Jesus, i learned a lot, and i have been able to find me. who i really am, and what i believe. i was talking about this with a couple friends, and they are feeling the same way. i have decided that i am going to use this time to get closer to Jesus, and find what He wants for me. i am still searching for who i am, but what a perfect time to do this. find who i am. so what that guy does come along i am strong and only bringing good things to the relationship. i am so glad that i did not jump right back a new relationship (i almost did). it would have just been another bad decision. plus i want someone who interests are first in Jesus and then in me, not the other way around. i have people around me who are willing to help me make the right life decisions. no one can do it alone. i tried to do it alone and failed. i have made so many mistakes, but i have salvation. obviously i will never be perfect, and i will continue to stumble. which is why it is so important to have people in your life to help keep you in line. it is nice to know that Jesus never loses a christian. this is the time in my life, where i get to decide my own future and what i (and Jesus) want. i don't think i have ever thought about what i want. this is exciting!

things the new year holds for me.

• getting my certification in nutrition and exercise
• being a crux leader
• new work schedule...never working later then 4pm (praise the lord no more 9 1/2 hour days)
• promotion at work, i will now be the rehab technician and financial advisor!
• maybe helping with worship for the middle school youth group(maybe)
• hopefully getting back into theater, which i miss so much!

in june i will be moving closer to the city...aka ballard, fremont, or queen ann with kristen...and maybe some other cool peeps. our newest idea is to rent a house boat on lake union. we would pretty much have the coolest pad to hang, and the best place to enjoy and nice glass of red wine. (which i am growing to like more then white)

"remember the time we lived on a house boat, yeah that was cool"